mean camel

today was just one of those days. know what i mean? nothing was really wrong, i just had a bad attitude, i think. jake had to work most of the day and night and usually i don't mind it at all. in fact, i kind of like the quiet of the night once the kids are asleep. for some reason, yesterday i was bumming myself out all day about jake working today. so, it just made the day drag on. i didn't have the most patience in the world, and we had to go to walmart. bad combo. little audrey has a cold, and you know how that girl is when she's under the weather... dra-ma-tic. everything is the end of the world. i decided to stop for an icee on the way to walmart, and got finley one too, of course. i would share with him, but i get coke flavor and didn't think caffeinating my 2 year old would help matters. the icee. the icee was the straw that broke the camel's back. the back of a tired camel. finley was content the whole walmart trip. thank you cold, sugary goodness. audrey on the other hand, wanted said icee the.whole.entire.time. she sits in the "big part" of the cart and fin in the front. she kept reaching for it and yelling and trying again, and banging her head on the cart, and screaming again, and playing with the can of cinnamon rolls as a drumstick, and eating deli turkey out of the bag, and screaming. i miraculously made it to the check out line where the kind cashier said, as i was holding screaming, snotting, trying to get the icee, audrey, "you have your arms full... but it doesn't seem like you mind too much." um, was she seeing what i was seeing?! finley LOVES "paying" at the store and always wants to swipe the card, so he's yelling in my ear, "my card swipe, my card swipe!" as audrey's trying to leap from my arms. i did not feel like i didn't mind my full arms at that moment. but i was so thankful for her kindness. it was obvious we were struggling. and she saw something different. and it encouraged me. 

perhaps i snapped more than usual today. perhaps i put audrey to bed early. perhaps i left a huge puddle of water from bathtime on the bathroom floor, and perhaps finley watched one too many blue's clues. but i did read "the very hungry caterpillar" with him before bed and we talked for several minutes about what a cocoon is (which is quite hard to explain) and how a caterpillar becomes a butterfly when it comes out of it's "house". and we counted the fruit the caterpillar ate, and we sang the "hi" song (finley tells me, "sing the 'enter random object here' song", and i just make one up everytime... the ball song, the tennis racket song, the peanut butter song, etc). i'm thankful for that time. i didn't feel like mother of the year today. and that's just fine. tomorrow's a comin'. i was able to bake and enjoy some of the quiet tonight and that was good. 

i'm ready for jake to be home, though :)

night all. thanks for reading this weird, not well thought out, million grammar mistakes, ramble on our day. appreciate it. really. 

love to you,

mer