right now

good day to you. hope it is going quite well.
currently at the greers:
audrey is dumping goldfish back and forth between two bowls. there will no doubt be many fish casualties we will have to vacuum up later.
finley is laying out on the couch with gunky pink eye (?)... I hope not. and a cough and fever. let's hope it stays contained to him. not likely.
bailey was sleeping soundly in my room, but as I started typing this she is now yelling at me through the monitor. dang it. be right back.

it's been an hour and a half since I wrote "be right back". lol.

right NOW, bailey is asleep in the swing.
finley is still dripping stuff from his eyes.
audrey is pouring water from her "big girl" cup into her bowl of pasta. I guess the water cup was a little premature.

this is my life right now. moment by moment. I can't think or plan much past the "right now". and I think that's just fine. I've been discouraged for several weeks since bailey came along. I think I was just grieving the freedom I had with a 3 and 2 year old. no 2-3 hour nursing schedule. no completely sleepless nights...yes, they've happened. no being controlled by her continuous napping schedule. no SCREAMING infant in the van for several long car rides. no doctors appointments to get to so often.

and then I had a realization. it was one night a few days ago. I was up rocking bailey back to sleep at some forsaken hour and it hit me...this is my job right now. not in a negative way. being this mom of a 3, 2 and infant baby is my job. no one else can calm bailey like I can. no one gets her to sleep faster. no one else nurses her. it's not always fun being tied down (that sounds terrible) to an infant in the house, but it's my job. and truly, it's a calling and a privilege. and I KNOW she will not be little for very long. I have 2 huge, giant kids who can attest to that. life speeds by.

so that's where we are. I am. my biggest sis, Katie, is coming on Monday and i'm really excited! :) i'm gonna make her do all kinds of tiring things. ha! we're a tiring bunch.

I really wish we weren't out of chocolate chips right now because choco chip cookies would just round out this day.

hope all is well in your world.
love,
mer